Smoking Fetish

Has been requested such a lot recently but alas you’ve missed the boat on that one, sugardick!

That filthy habit is one I ditched a while back.  Moving onto rolling one’s own pure tobacco still had me hacking like a good ‘un and looking as grey as the ash I was desperately sucking into my lungs and feeling like the very poison I was subjecting my poor little carcass to.

Once, many years ago, I did a smoking fetish session that had me virtually puking up.  Not being much of a chain smoker at the best of times, it was expected to be pretty much smoking the whole time and it was grim as fuck.

A bit like a recovering alcoholic, it’s just not possible to have ‘just the one’.  Mainly because it’s fucking minging and it doesn’t make any sense to conduct a high quality health regime only to piss on one’s own chips with a regular hit of carcinogens.

As orally obsessed as one may be, I can think of a multitude of things I’d far rather be getting my chops around!

Is Nothing Sacred?

After over a decade of enjoying the ride that is the Almighty AW, naturally a profile of this calibre attracts the attentions of the clueless numpties.  In the absence of any creativity of their own, the more inept inevitably turn to blatantly copying my own original text.

Not only from the main body itself but most recently, the fucking interview!

How low can one really stoop?

Neither AW nor I are ones for taking intellectual property theft lightly and once you are on the radar for being a shifty sort, it is inevitably a slippery slope before you are deleted permanently.

Just ask some of those tragic tits who have fucked with me in the past!

But the clueless cunts got to be quicker/better than that as my creative juices know no bounds and just as one’s education increases with unmatched perpetuity, and so does the ever evolving profile in all its multifaceted glory.  

How not to Book an Escort

With years of escorting experience behind me, I have acquired something of a finely tuned bullshit-ometer, coupled with acute intuition and other intangible variables, all of which keep me safe and sane.

At 45 years old I’m comfortable.  Not flashy, jet setting around the world bragging on Instagram about my latest superficial splurge in yet another gorgeous hotel; not really that frivolous but not fearing the bailiffs or wondering if I can afford a holiday this year – that kind of  comfortable.

This means I don’t need to work; I work because it’s fun, the sex interesting and the money is great, even with my 1-booking-a-day-more-like-a-week.

Bearing this in mind, you can imagine just how easily it is to NOT get a booking.  It could be something that I can’t quite put my finger on – perhaps the brusque, dismissive manner puts him on my Do Not Answer list.  Or maybe the agitated abusive swearing demonstrated by today’s latest Block List addition – KaneForFun (an ironic choice of moniker in retrospect since he sounded anything but)  on Adultwork, who called on DirectChat when my number was not appearing, as is often the case when I feel like taking enquiries by Email.

After further investigations into his claims that he had booked a male escort called Cameron from Maxes Angels it turns out they have no male escort of that name, according to Max himself.   Another tick in the close call box I’m sure you will agree.

You only get one chance to make a first impression/fuck it up.  Don’t be like Kane.

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Wank HO-liday!

These wank holidays are so much fun when you have a day of filth & depravity lined up!

Not being one to hurry one’s enjoyment of the finer things in life, some notice will be required to avoid mutual disappointment.

Not to say that your same day escort booking won’t be successful; it just might… but it is all the more likely if you are able to take your pleasure as seriously as I do! 😜

EXPOSED: HotPJ the cum junkie

I do love speaking to my filthy perverted friends on Adultwork and today I had the pleasure of speaking to one particular pervert who love love loves being exposed for the dirty little cum drinking cumslut that he is, so much so that I recorded a 2 minute snippet leaving it FREE so that all and sundry could hear what faggy things he loves to get up to on a lazy Sunday afternoon.

He later bottled it & requested it to be taken down, as they inevitably do…

Camroom Indecision!

The webcam room is taking shape just nicely now!  I didn’t like the spare room much and it just wasn’t big enough for my shenanigans.  It looked pretty in its own way but I wasn’t feeling it so now it’s being used for all my clothes & shoes which as you might imagine, are plentiful!


This is the room that didn’t quite make the grade.  I’ve seen worse as I trawl the rooms of my peers looking for inspiration, with lighting atrocities abound, distracting minutae and other such unnecessities.

The new one is basically my spacious lounge which is fab but such a large space has higher lighting demands.  This is secondary to the placement of one’s sex toys and awards, but more on those another time…



“Is it Really You?”

There are varying reasons for this tedious question to which I am subjected on a regular basis!

It’s not as though you can’t cross reference the images with:

To double check!

In all fairness, there is a fuck ton of image nicking about, but if you have found me here, on my site or then you are all good!

Manchester Now Fully Booked

Wow! After another insanely oversubscribed tour I am absolutely FUCKED in such an awesome way!

Slumped temporarily sated & utterly exhausted thanks to a ridiculously oversized appendage with the stamina of a frisky teenager (which he obviously was – several decades ago!!), I have no choice but to clear my diary to recover in every which way before the insanity resumes again tomorrow!

I have the luxury of a cooling fan wafting over my swollen & smashed but very very happy girly bits and generally taking it easy whilst my sexual strength rebuilds!

Being accused of “having a better offer” was surprisingly hurtful, particularly given the pride I take in my beautiful job together with the care, consideration and courtesy offered to the visitors I see.

However, without nurturing one’s health & observing basic self care there will be no Fun in our Fun Time for either of us.

Poorly Poorly AdultWork • Edited 10th June 2014

Another day, another bit of poorlyness at my lovely adultwork boo!

Short term it’s fine no problemo as I am practically fully booked today here in sunny Paddington but we do need to again consider where else to advertise given that this is not the first nor the last time this is happening.

My eggs are far from being in this one sexy basket but even so, 99% of my work comes from this site.

Slightly worrying, to say the least, time to add to one’s advertising venues methinks!

Glasgow here we cum!

Squeezing in a week long tour between my return from a 3 week jaunt in Chelsea & whizzing up to Manchester for a week was not quite what I had in mind but I received a pre paid booking which always seals the deal for such new adventures!

Flight, accommodation and airport parking is all sorted & I will be heading up on 26th June & stay for a decadent 7 nights in bonny scotland returning on 3rd June!

My private apartment is conveniently located near Glasgow Charing Cross and is used by myself only. I’m not really one for sharing in that way! 😉  There is plenty of parking and my fridge will be as stocked as my fertile imagination!

Bookings on AdultWork take priority of course but I also take incalls & outcalls wherever I am located, subject to usual background checks.